Monday 25 March 2013

Disorientated

Everyone in the universe has a purpose and everyone should look for exactly that. If you look, you'll eventually find it. That's my belief, only I'm struggling to find mine.

Now, it sounds like I'm in some inspiring, yet solemn storyline, only as my "future" is drawing closer and closer by the day, panic is beginning to set in. What am I doing with my life? What am I supposed to be doing with my life? Why does everybody else have a plan and yet I do not?

I always result in writing when I'm a little disorientated, only recently I don't know what to write. Recently, I struggle to know how to even start.

My dreams for the future are incredibly farfetched and unreachable. As much as I'd like to believe that maybe one day, one day, my life will be able to every hour of every day revolve around writing, the thought is soon suffocated by reality. This is where I am reminded that I need to redraft, reconsider.
 
"What do I stand for? What do I stand for? Most nights, I don't know anymore..." Fun. lyrics.

I know what "I stand for" in the way of who I am, the moral end of the spectrum, but when faced with the ominous question of my "future", my response will undoubtedly consist of a string of "um"s and "er"s before a flush of the cheeks and a stereotypical and untrue answer.

When young people think of the dreaded "future", I would say that the majority of people panic, but at least most have a rough idea of where they will be when asked "what will you be when you are older?", but me... With exams incredibly close, resulting in little time for me to sit back and just...think, I'm looking forward to summer so that I can plan. What I will plan, is the answer of the future.

Sparkles & Flowerpots,

The Girl in the Moonlight.

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